Beliefs

Milestones along life's highways necessitate acknowledgement. Fifty years of life seems to be one such occasion. An inventory taken at a specific time allows one to create an icon in time and space. None of us have the knowledge of time left to us or understand where we are in relationship to creation. All that seems to be indisputable is that we are a relatively young life form on the evolutionary scale of the universe. Given this fact it becomes reasonably evident that we are not fashioning a proficient method of living. When our thinking and acting are closely examined they appear to be deranged. Inordinate amounts of time and energy are used in the furtherance of ideals that are based on a number of basic delusions that to an extent effect every one of us. The delusions seem to revolve around unfounded fears dealing in fundamental terms with control and powerlessness faulty perspectives inherited from our primary caregivers who inherited them from there primary caregiver which retreat into the mists of time ad infinitum. These delusions seem to stem from a compulsive urge to control one's destiny and those surrounding you. These feelings stem from our obsessional beliefs in emotional security and financial security. This delusion is used to mitigate the inescapable fact that we all die and hence these obsession also die at the graveside. It is possible that these self same obsessions hasten that day.
Perhaps it was my belief and actions in following the insane acts of materialism that forced me to reappraise my position in life. Slowly I came to believe that not only was I deranged so was everyone else with only one notable exemption, Jesus Christ who had been judicially murdered two thousand years previously for holding similar beliefs. This basic knowledge that started as a small germ infected me. It was this single germ of reason. The dawning belief in a twelve step program that unconditionally started to displace all my value systems. The only description of how I felt was as if I had become a full bucket of water My life felt as if it was being displaced as if an object the truth or truth objects were being dropped into it .The water it forced out by this displacement of the truth was stale, old and stinking half formed concepts Therefore this one simple act caused me to change over time all my old belief systems.
So that one act could over time cause the total displacements of my materialistic beliefs. I came to believe that the only choice I had without alcohol was to be restored to sanity. I asked for explanations of life and death of creation and I received explanations that were reasonable and clear. These explanations would take me years to understand but they were given freely to me. When I asked for them. The trouble was I didn’t realise that derangement was a basic human condition that everyone was deranged the degrees of this insanity differed and could best be described as a common delusion that appeared to offer comfort to people who followed similar materialistic delusions. The false delusion that money, relationships would bring happiness on a permanent basis freely with no cost to the recipient seemed to be the delusion that fueled the compulsions and obsessions that attached themselves like a parasite to its host.
This belief in my own insanity was to cause me, still causes me immense pain caused by the weight and enormity of the burden that I had asked for restoration of some thing that had never existed before sanity, I had asked for life without delusion this I would now have believe to be an insane act and nevertheless there appears to be, over a period of fourteen years' answers and definitely a pattern of recovery that does not appear to relate to me. This form of recovery seems to have its own dynamics. However we live in a mislead society so where did these answers come from. It can only have been from the many distinct groups that I had joined. I did not know that the act of joining a group of people who struggled to resolve there emotional problems threw understanding the twelve step program and the participation within the group was the act that would alter my perception of people and consequently release me from the addictive dis-eases that had obsessed me here was the place that I could medicated my dysfunctional self-centredness of belonging to or owning other people the pain this caused me I self medicated with the abuse of alcohol.
The knowledge that I would truly understand that I was powerless over people and events inside my life was the act that would free me from a fundamental fallacy that I owned some form of power over other people. This fact was to allow me to stop the dysfunctional actions of trying constantly to control people, places and things inside my life where I falsely perceived I actually could exercise control, to constantly attempt to fit a square peg in a very round hole. I had to accept this or die, as long as I believed that I had control I would remain mislead living a lie. When I stopped drinking I was taking an action that was to make a profound change in my life. It uncovered my basic dysfunction that I shared with the rest of humanity but could not come to terms with, the wants and needs to control others in a wide variety of situations. Was this knowledge exclusive. I believe not but I believe the restoration process to be unique series of events. This has consolidated itself into a system of beliefs.
Sanity, full possession of faculties, a normal mental condition. Yes, that is the definition of sanity but what is normal, and what had been normal before human being had become a materialist. I was about to find out. One thing I knew that my life had become highly abnormal. The weird and insecure life I lead was as if I had left the planet and I felt I had to be reinvented. To an extent I had I was living in a different country but living inside the same head .If I was to be reinvigorate who or what were my beliefs going to be. These beliefs arrived in many different ways carried by a host of differing people from priests to murderers.
The message is not complete, but the belief is. The belief is that within each and every person are the blue prints of the human race not only the blueprints but the plans for all creation. The god of genesis spread himself into creation this spreading is still taking place and instead of being at day seven of creation we are in fact at day three and half. We are all born with this enlightenment who ever we are, but we are taught to ignore this reality. The sad fact is that most people feel they’ve been robbed of something. THE SOUL IS OUR CONSCIOUSNESS.
Our ability of being able to communicate is the soul of god. How I have come to believe has been threw transference. My understanding is in attempting to communicate with other human beings using our internal voice. We are introduced to a God consciousness, a feeling of charity. These communications have proved to me that God is very much alive the problem is in interpreting the transmission in human terms, it's not to do with the exterior world. It's to about how we communicate with our interior world it's about how we talk internally with ourselves articulating with the external using two different languages.The language we talk to ourselves on the inside is not the same as our external communication, communicating with ourselves is not the same as communicating with others. Love thy neighbour takes on a whole different meaning if you examine this basic belief that we belong to one being that being is defused into the general population that’s right you’ve got it everyone and everything is god but its in the transmission of the communication that the miracle becomes apparent. There is only one communication and that is in the diffusion of god .God is not an all powerful being he is the sum of the parts much more of an inexact science . A being that is by its existence constantly changing and yet the messages it relays to humanity are constant over time and place. Incredibly simple yet in number as complex as the divergent actions that are dictated by people.Why should you think of another person as if it were yourself and why should you love that person. Full possession of faculties means wholeness a complete understanding of the parts and how they function I believe we are very close to this understanding and that co-dependency is an over or wrongly developed instinct to complete this action in an inappropriate way. Not wrong in itself but wrong in the obsessive nature in which it is inappropriately used.
This use can become pathological in that the recipient believes that the search method is the goal and not the means to that goal. That goal is the need to communicate with another person, a need to learn the language of love. A language of charity goodwill to all people because our essence is inside all people that essence is god of our understanding the unique creation. I use the word creation rather than creator as the action is constantly expanding.
If I am correct that these communications are all important and that the interaction between the neurones in one persons brain is similar to the interaction in some one else’s brain then the communications that are taking place in one brain is similar to the transmissions in the other brains. As I understand the basic structure is simple . The neurones work in parallel inside the brain that is a single brain, but what happens then these neurones communicate in a larger scenario what happens, what do they create a chaos .Well yes sometimes, but not always. If the normal chit chat is stemmed the co-dependent chatter what is left is the underlying message which start to convey clearly .Well perhaps its the language of feelings the chemical language of the brain maybe the chemical surges of the charged neurones are the connection a language of the brain and when we communicate in this way we actual touch soul to soul . In practicable terms there is a different feeling to this form communication cleaner more simplistic. A feeling of peace and serenity.
This transmission of feelings becomes a more exact science when it is practised in a group environment. It is in direct contrast to our usual masking process of attempting to guess what message the recipient requires and how we are to present this message to gain acceptance. This delusion or game that we attempt to play takes an inordinate amount of time, creativity and energy. The game that we play tends to deplete us because it takes immense amounts of attentioninal energy. The results always cause us a depletion of spiritual resources we always feel tired and apprehensive inasmuch as our perceived skills make us feel inadequate since they are based on our internal world attempting to falsify or present a untrue facade to our external world. Our attempts at guessing the results are inevitably wrong. This fact causes us to try ever harder to make our perceptions come true. The ability to arrest this compulsive form of behaviour releases us from the enigma of our past. The guilt and shame of not being able to control others actions or indeed there thoughts gradually leave us. This inbuilt feature of our life the need to indulge in codepenancy will constantly struggle to reawaken and needs perpetual monitoring. There appears to be scientific basis for my belief in the big bang theory of a higher power in the work of a Russian Semyon Kirklain. Who has found that the Kirlian effect a measurable bioplasma field that is attached to a large number of animate and inanimate objects, human ,animal, vegetable. This invisible energy field exists in parallel with the physical world. The argument is that whist objects are not alive they are all made from the same building blocks as everything else in the universe, including ourselves. According to the bigbang theory, all matter comes from the same common source, and therefore could share the same internal energy. Kirklain photography of the bioplasmatic fields can be reproduced in laboratory conditions, allowing serious analysis of the results.
There can be fluctuations in the energy fields that correlate to the spiritual health of the recipient object and imprinting appears to take place from one object to another. This would support my view of higher power force that is diffused within not only the population but amongst all created matter and that effects on this created matter are influenced by human ,animal and vegetable "feelings." Which either strengthen or weaken this field. Physical sickness, mental ill health and chronic dysfunctional behaviour have a negative price to be paid by this life force . Which lead to depressive illnesses a depression or lessening of this life force? This could mean that the brain actually produces a measurable effect in that the efficacy is measurable in its influence on others and the its environment either negatively or positively.
So much for the twentieth century my beliefs stem from the beginnings of time and I have come to believe that there have been specific messengers such as Bonhoffer in the more recent past. The messenger that I intuitively feel has more to say about co-dependency and its misuse is a thirty year old carpenter from Isreal. The message has stood the test of time but not the interpretation. The interpretations are clearly acknowledged by the gospel according to St Luke. Firstly Luke makes a strong connection between the first human being and Jesus. He also states that Jesus was self-possessed by the spirit after starving for forty days in a wilderness. At the end of this period Jesus totally abandons the world of materialism. He realises he will be deluded by accepting the false promises of the material world. The promise that more material wealth will bring spiritual growth."Turn stone to bread." Interestingly Jesus reply to this temptation is to answer that he is sustained by his communication with his spirit an internal communication renouncing external wish fulfillment.He was shown the habitable world in a twinkling of an eye this was an astonishing thing to say in Jesus time . Now with the advent of television and the computer internet its very simple to be shownthe habiable world in the twinkling of an eye . We are still told that it is possible to take possession of the material world or rather the best bits.Amazingly we still believe this deception which is pumped out in almost all advertising promotions .Jesus was expressly offered this delusion. The false premise that you can control everything. His temptation to use spiritual powers in the furtherance of a material life were renounced and his tempter stood off waiting to tempt him latter. In the terms of my belief it's the renouncement of co-dependency and the knowledge that it will return in many different appearances threw out my life that interest me. This renouncement of co-dependency by Jesus fills him with spiritual power. He directly shares this new found wisdom in the most public places. He speaks of transference with the spirit of god and that they can be free and fulfil the promises of the spirit. He says that first he had to heal himself and that spiritual messages primarily come to the outcast in Jesus' day the leper in twentieth century terms the H.I.V sufferer. Nobody in his own village wishes to hear his new found faith and they throw him out.
What's happened to this outcast carpenter that fills him with authority,ability,wieght and power. Where did this new found power come from . I believe that Jesus in the desert accomplished a perfect version of the twelve steps and I also believe that he was born far from complete it was the renouncing and rebuilding in the desert at around thirty years of age that gave him this power and authority. He stated that lepers had the communications from god. Why , because they were forced into a abandoning the material world. The material world hated lepers because they showed the delusions of life for what they were. False,Jesus proceed to do miracles. What are these miracles? casting out demons. He deals in a healing manner with the mentally ill.He communicates, shares directly with the illness, he facilitates health. The people get well on the basis of shared experience.What do we have in common he asks the mentally ill.After teaching or healing he has to retreat into solitude to be able to communicate with his inner self. He says over and over again you must be remade and reborn into the spiritual life it is not possible to hold on to partially formed concepts.